And what a surgery it was!!

I was under anesthesia for 5 hours. Hopefully this means I'll be able to go for a while before needing another procedure.

I'm falling asleep. I'll be inpatient for two more weeks.


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I think waking up early today is [insert higher power here]'s way of telling me to "Take a shower today, Nichole. Jeeeez."

Well played, higher power. When my time is as limited as it is, showers just aren't first on my list of things to do.

Here are pictures of Violet. It's been a while since I've shared one of her. She's not even a baby anymore, ( Read more... )

I was just thinking about how I can't blow out birthday candles, but I can run a few miles without issue. And also, how I can't do sprints or interval training, but I was able to run two and a half miles yesterday evening without having ran in YEARS.

That's the nature of an obstructive lung disease.

The lung measurement most paid attention to is the ( Read more... )

I'm not sure WHY I've been struggling more with mania and mixed episodes, but I certainly am struggling.

I took an atypical antipsychotic for the first time in well over a year last night and I'm remembering why they are kind of the worst.

On one hand, my brain is slower and less obsessive. There's not as much of a feeling of people being out to get ( Read more... )

The idea of working towards becoming a doula is really appealing to me. Especially after the Banan-Uh (with no training or knowledge that doulas are a thing) coached me through my pregnancy and labor.

She helped me breathe during my final pushes in V's labor by using musical terms that I understood (I'm decent at playing single reed woodwinds and I ( Read more... )

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Making this seemed more important than sleeping:


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Long walks with the bean are making life feel not just bearable or tolerable, but beautiful.

Shannon died. She's back to where she started from, though she was really there all along. We all are. We just are. Always.

Nature is forever in a state of flux in that sometimes matter comes together to form a consciousness. It's random and beautiful. I feel ( Read more... )

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